A documentary titled Mistress Dispeller is set to premiere in New Zealand next week as part of the International Film Festival. The film, directed by Elizabeth Lo, delves into the complex dynamics of infidelity in Chinese relationships, focusing on a couple from Luoyang, Henan province, and the husband’s mistress, Feifei. This documentary highlights the emerging phenomenon of mistress dispellers, individuals who help couples navigate the emotional turmoil caused by infidelity.

In a recent interview with RNZ’s Nine To Noon, Lo explained that the role of mistress dispellers has evolved over the past decade in response to the needs of couples facing crises. She noted that having a mistress was historically seen as a status symbol for men, reflecting their success. The rise of mistress dispellers has provided a solution for individuals unwilling to leave their marriages but seeking to address infidelity.

Lo described these professionals as “tools” that wives can utilize, provided they have the resources to engage them. They aim to resolve conflicts in a peaceful and non-confrontational manner. “It’s almost like a tool that oftentimes wives… can use if they have resources to hire someone who can… fight for them,” she said. This approach allows couples to avoid “losing face” while addressing the issue, creating an environment where the mistress can “leave the situation without resistance.”

While researching for the film, Lo’s team discovered a notable mistress dispeller named Wang. Wang’s unique background and methods offered insight into this niche profession. Having experienced infidelity within her own family, she immersed herself in psychology to understand human emotions better. Lo explained that Wang effectively positions herself as a family therapist, infiltrating a relationship under a false identity—often as an old friend or acquaintance—to build trust with both the spouse and the mistress.

Through her empathetic approach, Wang aims to guide all parties involved towards ending the affair voluntarily. Unlike some of her counterparts who may employ intimidation tactics, Wang focuses on fostering connections and understanding. “She really positions herself as this sort of couple’s therapist and therapist even to the mistress,” Lo stated. This approach allows her to navigate the sensitive situation, helping individuals see her as a supportive figure.

Wang’s work also reflects the stigma surrounding therapy in China, as she can only engage with families under a false identity, according to Lo. To ensure the documentary’s ethical standards, the husband and mistress were not fully informed about the film’s content initially. They were approached to participate in a broader exploration of modern love and dating in China. After several months of filming, the couple was given the opportunity to re-consent to their involvement once they understood Wang’s role.

The cost of hiring a mistress dispeller can reach approximately US$20,000 (NZ$33,000) to resolve a typical case. Wang has built a successful career in this arena, but her motivations extend beyond financial gain. Lo emphasized that Wang genuinely believes in helping individuals during their most challenging moments, often shrouded in shame. “She positions herself… that sharing your private struggles publicly will help other people who find themselves in this kind of emotional turmoil,” Lo remarked.

As the documentary Mistress Dispeller prepares to screen in Auckland, Wellington, and Hamilton next week, it promises to shed light on a unique aspect of contemporary Chinese society, offering audiences a glimpse into the intricate web of relationships and the lengths to which individuals will go to preserve them.

A documentary titled Mistress Dispeller is set to debut in New Zealand next week as part of the International Film Festival. Directed by Hong Kong-based Elizabeth Lo, the film explores the complex and often hidden world of mistress dispellers in contemporary China, focusing on a couple from Luoyang, Henan province, and the husband’s mistress, Feifei.

Over the past decade, the phenomenon of hiring professionals to address infidelity has gained traction in China, according to Lo. She explained that the practice emerged in response to couples facing crises in their relationships. Traditionally, a man having a mistress was viewed as a sign of success, but as societal values shift, many couples seek to repair their marriages rather than end them.

Lo described the mistress dispeller’s role as a conflict resolver who operates in a manner that avoids confrontation. “It’s almost like a tool that oftentimes wives can use if they have resources to hire someone who can fight for them,” she stated. This approach allows those involved to navigate sensitive issues without losing face, facilitating a resolution that the mistress believes is her own choice.

In her quest to find an effective mistress dispeller for the documentary, Lo’s team connected with Wang, a professional in this niche field. Wang’s personal experiences with infidelity within her family motivated her to delve into the psychology of relationships. “She has developed this niche within the market of family therapy,” Lo noted, explaining that Wang adopts a false identity, such as that of an old friend, to gain trust and influence the parties involved.

Wang’s method contrasts sharply with the tactics used by some other mistress dispellers, who may rely on intimidation. Instead, she positions herself as a therapist, offering guidance not only to the couple but also to the mistress. “By the end of the process, each person in the love triangle sees her as the guiding light that’s helping them in their lives,” Lo remarked.

Recognizing the stigma surrounding therapy in China, Wang found that her approach allowed her to work with families in need without openly presenting herself as a therapist. To maintain ethical standards, Lo ensured that both the husband and mistress were not fully informed about the film’s content during the initial recruitment process. They were approached to participate in a broader narrative about modern love and dating in China.

Throughout the documentary’s three to four months of filming, the couple was given the opportunity to withdraw their consent upon learning about Wang’s true role. Fortunately, the trio felt comfortable enough to continue participating. “They trusted teacher Wang so much that they agreed to remain featured,” Lo explained.

Wang’s services typically command a fee of around $20,000 (USD) to resolve a case of infidelity, reflecting both the complexity and emotional weight of the situations she addresses. While the ethics of such services may be debated, Wang is driven by a belief that she is providing essential support to individuals facing crises often shrouded in shame.

Lo emphasized that by sharing their experiences publicly, those involved in the documentary could help others navigate similar emotional turmoil. Mistress Dispeller will screen in Auckland, Wellington, and Hamilton starting next week, inviting audiences to explore this unique intersection of love, betrayal, and the quest for resolution in modern relationships.

The England Lionesses successfully defended their UEFA Women’s Euro title, winning against Spain in a dramatic penalty shootout on July 31, 2024, in Basel, Switzerland. The match concluded 1-1 after extra time, with England emerging victorious after a tense shootout, securing their second consecutive Euros championship.

Spain took an early lead in the 25th minute when Mariona Caldentey capitalized on a defensive lapse, heading a cross from Ona Batlle past England goalkeeper Hannah Hampton. England struggled initially, particularly with Lauren James sidelined due to an ankle injury. However, coach Sarina Wiegman‘s decision to substitute in Kelly before half-time proved pivotal.

Kelly’s introduction revitalized the team, and she provided a crucial assist for Alessia Russo, who equalized in the 57th minute with a precise header. Despite Spain controlling possession, they could not find a second goal, leading to extra time where both teams remained locked at 1-1.

The penalty shootout began dramatically, with Spain’s goalkeeper Cata Coll saving an attempt from Beth Mead. However, England’s Hampton responded with impressive saves against Caldentey and Aitana Bonmati, giving England a crucial advantage. Coll managed to stop a shot from Leah Williamson, but Spain’s Salma Paralluelo missed her penalty, hitting it wide.

This set the stage for Kelly, who had previously scored the decisive goal in the 2022 final against Germany. With a signature run-up, she confidently struck the ball into the net, celebrating with her teammates in front of the jubilant England fans.

“I’m so proud of this team, so grateful to wear this badge, and I’m so proud to be English,” Kelly remarked after the match. “I was cool, I was composed, and I knew I was going to hit the back of the net.”

This final marked the first time since the inaugural tournament in 1984 that the championship was decided by penalties. An ecstatic Hampton reflected on the team’s resilience: “Unbelievable, incredible. We showed throughout this tournament that we can come back when we go a goal down. We just keep going, and we did that today.”

With this victory, the England Lionesses continue to solidify their position as one of the leading teams in women’s football, showcasing not only skill but also determination and grit throughout the tournament.

The artistry of Auckland-based photographer Scott Cai draws attention to the often-overlooked moments of beauty that populate everyday life. His work emphasizes the significance of capturing fleeting instances that might otherwise go unnoticed, inviting viewers to appreciate the subtlety of their surroundings.

Cai’s photographic journey reflects a deep commitment to finding aesthetic value in the mundane. He describes his approach as an exploration of “subtle moments of beauty through his camera lens.” This perspective not only defines his artistic style but also connects with audiences on a personal level, encouraging them to see the world differently.

Discerning the Ordinary

In an art scene bustling with conventional themes, Cai’s focus on the understated sets him apart. He often ventures into the streets of Auckland, capturing scenes that many pass by without a second glance. Whether it is the play of light on a building or the interaction of people in a park, his lens reveals a narrative that invites contemplation and appreciation.

His work has garnered attention not only for its technical proficiency but also for its emotional resonance. Cai notes that the essence of his photography lies in its ability to evoke feelings and stir memories. “Every shot tells a story,” he explains, reflecting on the importance of personal connection in visual storytelling.

Cai’s portfolio includes a diverse array of subjects, from architecture to candid portraits. Each image is an invitation to pause and reflect on the beauty that exists in daily life. His commitment to this artistic vision has established him as a notable figure within the local art community, where his work is celebrated for its authenticity and depth.

Impact and Recognition

The impact of Cai’s photography extends beyond aesthetics; it encourages dialogue about the value of mindfulness in a fast-paced world. By showcasing the elegance of ordinary moments, he inspires others to adopt a more observant perspective.

Cai’s efforts have not gone unnoticed; he has been featured in several exhibitions throughout New Zealand. His work resonates with audiences of all ages, bridging generational gaps and fostering a shared appreciation for art.

In a recent interview, Cai emphasized his belief that everyone possesses the ability to see beauty in their environment. “It’s about training your eye to notice what’s around you,” he stated. This philosophy underpins his teaching workshops, where he shares techniques for budding photographers to enhance their observational skills.

As the art community evolves, Scott Cai continues to make a significant mark, reminding us that beauty often lies in the details. His photographs serve as a testament to the power of perspective, encouraging all to pause and appreciate the world through a different lens.