Understanding “Sense of Presence” Experiences During Grief

As the festive season approaches, many individuals experience a complex mix of joy and sorrow, particularly as they remember lost loved ones. This emotional landscape often brings to light what researchers refer to as “sense of presence” experiences—fleeting moments where individuals feel the presence of those who have passed away. These sensations can manifest in various ways, including familiar scents, visual apparitions, or comforting touches.

According to studies, between 47 percent and 82 percent of bereaved individuals report experiencing such moments. These experiences are surprisingly common, yet they raise important questions about the psychological mechanisms at play. Researchers are now delving deeper into why these occurrences happen and how they may assist individuals in coping with loss.

Insights from Bereaved Individuals

In investigating this phenomenon, I interviewed 26 bereaved individuals across New Zealand, Australia, Canada, and the United States. Participants came from diverse cultural backgrounds and held both religious and non-religious beliefs. Their accounts revealed a consistent theme: the sense of presence is more closely linked to the emotional bonds shared with the deceased rather than to spiritual beliefs or cultural practices.

Many participants described these experiences occurring during moments of emotional vulnerability, providing comfort in times of need. For instance, one individual recounted feeling a familiar embrace while alone at the dining table, while another noted the scent of cigar smoke that reminded him of his grandfather. Such experiences often take place in locations that hold significant memories associated with the deceased.

Historical Context and Theoretical Frameworks

The concept of sensing the presence of deceased loved ones is not new. In a pivotal study by psychiatrist William Dewi Rees in 1971, nearly 40 percent of 293 widowed individuals in Wales reported sensing their spouses after death. This research was groundbreaking in its approach to bereavement, suggesting that such experiences are common and can provide solace to those grieving.

Despite this early research, the psychiatric community remained conflicted over the implications of these experiences. They were often dismissed as hallucinations or framed within supernatural contexts, leaving little room for psychological explanations that resonate with the experiences of the bereaved.

A significant shift occurred in the 1990s with the introduction of the Continuing Bonds Theory, detailed in the book “Continuing Bonds: New Understandings of Grief.” Authors Dennis Klass, Phyllis Silverman, and Steven Nickman argued that a sense of presence is not unusual or pathological but reflects the ongoing inner relationship between the bereaved and the deceased.

My current research aims to investigate the brain mechanisms that may underlie these experiences. I am exploring the theory that the brain maintains a “person network” that encompasses memory, emotion, and social perception, which stores the complex associations we have with significant individuals in our lives. When someone close to us passes away, the brain does not immediately update this network. Instead, it undergoes a gradual process to adapt to the new reality of a non-physical relationship.

This perspective helps clarify why a sense of presence differs from other neurological phenomena, such as autoscopic hallucinations, where individuals feel detached from their bodies. In contrast, presence experiences are often recognized as belonging to the loved one who has died, highlighting the significance of attachment and memory.

To further investigate these ideas, I am conducting an electroencephalogram (EEG) study to measure brain activity in response to different individuals within a person’s social circle. Preliminary findings suggest that each relationship activates a distinct person network, shedding light on why some individuals continue to feel the presence of those they have lost.

Understanding these experiences can provide insight into how we maintain meaningful relationships, even after death. By exploring these moments more thoroughly and encouraging open discussions about them, we may better comprehend a common aspect of grief—especially during a season that emphasizes connection.