Understanding “Sense of Presence” Experiences in Grief

As the festive season approaches, many individuals reflect on their relationships, both with those present and those who have passed away. A phenomenon known as “sense of presence” experiences has gained attention, particularly during times of remembrance. These fleeting moments can involve sensing a deceased loved one in various forms, such as familiar scents, auditory cues, or even a tactile sensation.

Researchers have documented that these experiences are remarkably common. Studies indicate that between 47 percent and 82 percent of bereaved individuals report such sensations, as highlighted in a 2020 review. These experiences can provide comfort, fostering an enduring emotional connection with the deceased.

The concept of sensing a deceased person is not new. In 1971, psychiatrist William Dewi Rees found that nearly 40 percent of a study involving 293 widowed individuals in Wales reported feeling the presence of their deceased spouse. This groundbreaking research suggested that these experiences were not pathological but rather a normal aspect of the grieving process.

Despite initial skepticism from the psychiatric community, researchers have shifted their perspective over the decades. The introduction of the Continuing Bonds Theory in the 1990s, spearheaded by Dennis Klass, Phyllis Silverman, and Steven Nickman, reframed these experiences as a natural part of an ongoing relationship between the bereaved and the deceased.

Current research is exploring the neurological mechanisms that may underpin these sensations. A PhD candidate studying grief and presence experiences has interviewed 26 bereaved individuals from diverse backgrounds in countries including New Zealand, Australia, Canada, and the United States. The findings indicate that feelings of presence are closely linked to the emotional closeness of the relationship, rather than spiritual beliefs or cultural practices.

Many participants reported that these experiences often occurred during moments of emotional need or in locations deeply associated with the deceased. Over time, the frequency of these sensations tended to decrease, even as the individuals expressed a desire for them to continue.

The research also suggests that the brain may maintain a “person network,” which encompasses memories, emotions, and perceptions tied to significant individuals. Following a loss, the brain does not immediately update this network. Instead, it gradually adapts to the absence, allowing for an ongoing internal relationship.

Understanding this adjustment process can illuminate why individuals perceive the presence of loved ones after they have passed. The sense of presence can be seen as a brief representation of the internal model stored in the brain, manifesting as a familiar and comforting experience.

To further investigate this phenomenon, ongoing studies include electroencephalogram (EEG) research aimed at measuring brain activity in response to different individuals within a person’s social circle. Preliminary findings suggest that each relationship activates a unique network in the brain.

These insights may help explain the enduring connections many feel with loved ones who are no longer physically present. By openly discussing and exploring these moments, individuals can gain a deeper understanding of a common aspect of grief, particularly during a season that emphasizes connection and remembrance.

As we navigate through the holiday period, recognizing the emotional bonds that continue to exist can provide a sense of comfort and understanding for those experiencing loss.